Jesus’ closest disciple, the Apostle Peter, publicly denied Jesus three times in a row. At the root cause of his actions were fear of man - at the heart of Peters issue was the worship of approval.
Then they seized him [Jesus] and led him away, bringing him into the high priest's house, and Peter was following at a distance. 55 And when they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and sat down together, Peter sat down among them. 56 Then a servant girl, seeing him as he sat in the light and looking closely at him, said, “This man also was with him.” 57 But he denied it, saying, “Woman, I do not know him.” 58 And a little later someone else saw him and said, “You also are one of them.” But Peter said, “Man, I am not.” 59 And after an interval of about an hour still another insisted, saying, “Certainly this man also was with him, for he too is a Galilean.” 60 But Peter said, “Man, I do not know what you are talking about.” And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. 61 And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him, “Before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times.” 62 And he went out and wept bitterly. - Luke 22:54 (ESV)
Peter had walked closely with Jesus for over 3 years. He literally dropped his livelihood to follow Jesus and sit under his teachings. He swore to Jesus that he would never leave him. Moments before this denial, Peter attempted to kill someone who was involved with Jesus’ arrest. Whenever the disciples are listed, Peter is always mentioned first. He is the leader of the pack; Jesus’ “right hand man.” But in a moment of fear and attempting to gain the approval of some strangers he renounced his faith.
Paul rebuked the church in Galatia because they were turning to a different gospel than the one he preached to them. The gospel is the dominant theme in all six chapters in Galatians. Paul defends the gospel (ch 1-2), explains it (ch 3-4), and give ways to practically apply it (ch 5-6).
6 I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting him who called you in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel— 7 not that there is another one, but there are some who trouble you and want to distort the gospel of Christ. 8 But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a gospel contrary to the one we preached to you, let him be accursed. 9 As we have said before, so now I say again: If anyone is preaching to you a gospel contrary to the one you received, let him be accursed. 10 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:6-10 ESV)
The church has debated over the gospel from its birth. In writing his letter, Paul knows he is going to potentially lose popularity and approval with the Galatians and anyone else reading his letter. This is precisely why he adds this statement in verse 10.
For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.
Since Paul is not in bondage to the idol of approval, he takes a “risk” in offending others for the sake of defending the gospel of Jesus Christ. He also does this when confronting Peter about his worship of approval, which manifested in racist behavior.
11 But when Cephas came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face, because he stood condemned. 12 For before certain men came from James, he was eating with the Gentiles; but when they came he drew back and separated himself, fearing the circumcision party. 13 And the rest of the Jews acted hypocritically along with him, so that even Barnabas was led astray by their hypocrisy. 14 But when I saw that their conduct was not in step with the truth of the gospel, I said to Cephas before them all, “If you, though a Jew, live like a Gentile and not like a Jew, how can you force the Gentiles to live like Jews?” (Galatians 2:11-14 ESV)
Peter's harsh tone of voice and fearful behaviors revealed the condition of his mind whereas his beliefs revealed the atmosphere of his heart. His issue was not that he cursed, denied Christ, or turned on his Gentile friends; it’s that he elevated man’s opinion over God’s opinion. He feared the Jews more than God. He worshipped the idol of approval, which has unlimited destructive potential.
The Root issue in worshiping approval
The root issue in the idol of approval is worship; specifically, the worship of man. Fear of man or living to please others over God is essentially worship. The shift of focus from God to people is a form of worship. Believers in Christ who renounce their faith operate out of fear.
Nevertheless, many even of the authorities believed in him, but for fear of the Pharisees they did not confess it, so that they would not be put out of the synagogue; for they loved the glory that comes from man more than the glory that comes from God
(John 12:42-43 ESV)
The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.
(Proverbs 29:25 ESV)
One participant from a Freedom Appointment in Virginia Beach reflects in his freedom from approval:
There are a lot of different things that could be at the root of approval. For me, it was pride. I wanted the outward appearance of excellence, humility, 'coolness', intelligence, put-togetherness, and no apparent major sin struggles and as a result was unwilling to be vulnerable and let people in (in church, CG, with my wife) because then they'd know how awful I really was and I wouldn't be able to maintain my own prideful self-image.
On the other hand, sometimes I would seek the approval of a stranger (or even friend) in order to validate myself, inflate my ego, or even facilitate a physical or emotional connection with them, even if it was inappropriate or extramarital.
This man learned through his freedom session that his destructive behaviors that nearly ended his marriage were flowing from pride in his heart, which comes first from the roots of deception and rebellion.
John piper also connects approval to the fear of man, which is rooted in pride:
Fear of man may not feel like pride, but that’s what God says it is,
“Who do you think you are to fear man and forget me your Maker!”
The point is this: If you fear man, you have begun to deny the holiness, the worth of God and his Son, Jesus. God is infinitely stronger than man. He is infinitely wiser and infinitely more full of reward and joy.
Piper goes on to label fear and pride as an insult to God:
To turn from him out of fear of what man can do is to discount all that God promises to be for those who fear him. It is a great insult. And in such an insult God can take no pleasure.
Christians must renounce the idol of approval because it is evil and offensive in God's sight.
Deliverance from the idol of Approval
Freedom from the idol of approval starts with confession. When a Christian realizes they are elevating the approval of man over God’s approval, they must confess their sin and thank God for his forgiveness (1 John 1:9). Sometimes this revelation comes “out of nowhere,” but usually surfaces in the midst of a gospel-centered community. In this type of community, others can see and graciously point out sin in the safety of a community group. In a healthy community group, accountability is mutual and received without self-defense. Small groups that lack this element should work together to create an environment of safety to expose sin without judgment or fear of gossip. Anyone exposing themselves must choose to do so in faith.
Freedom from approval must be maintained in and through Gospel-centered community. When approval is exposed in a healthy gospel-centered group, the person confessing the sin moves right into thanksgiving and the group avoids “rescuing” (i.e., telling the person they’re not so bad) or advice-giving (i.e., “you know what you should do is…”). The group should be quick to listen and slow to speak, which gives the Holy Spirit freedom to move in the group without distractions.
The first words from a group member should be something encouraging (i.e., “thanks for sharing. That took a lot of courage”). In every instance, the group’s objective is to maintain the spirit of Christ regardless
A kingdom-focused mindset
Truths that build up a person and help them stay kingdom-focused rather than people focuses are critical to maintaining freedom from worshipping the approval of others:
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33 ESV
The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me? The Lord is on my side as my helper; I shall look in triumph on those who hate me. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes (Psalm 118:6-9 ESV)
But just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts (1 Thessalonians 2:4 ESV)
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ (Colossians 3:23-24 ESV).
So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him (2 Corinthians 5:9 ESV)
You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God (James 4:4 ESV)
Common Approval Idols
Seeking the validation of others (list by name)
Seeking the affirmation of others (list by name)
Parents/Grandparents/Guardians
Uncles/aunts
Siblings/step-siblings
The “cool kids” at school
The “higher ups” at work
Friends
Boyfriend/Girlfriend
Children/Step-children
Spouse/Ex-spouse/Fiancé
The opinion of others on social media
Text/email (“I need a reply”)
Pastors & spiritual leaders
Teachers & professors
Coaches
Neighbors
Fill in the blank ___________________
Renouncing the god of approval:
Lord, I have been insecure and have worshipped the approval of others. Thank you for your forgiveness. You alone approve of me and have freed me up from needing the approval of others. I rejoice in the truth of being approved by the Father through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Conclusion
The Christian life must be preoccupied with pleasing the father instead of living for people's approval. Jesus' mission in life was to please the father. He was completely free from “needing” the approval of man.
28 So Jesus said to them, “When you have lifted up the Son of Man, then you will know that I am he, and that I do nothing on my own authority, but speak just as the Father taught me. 29 And he who sent me is with me. He has not left me alone, for I always do the things that are pleasing to him.” 30 As he was saying these things, many believed in him (John 8:28-30 ESV).
Just imagine what the church would look like if our mission every day was to please the Father. We’d be people of faith, not operating out of the flesh, and not conformed to the pattern of this world, but transformed by the renewing of our minds, testing and discerning the will of God in our lives.
And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him (Hebrews 11:6 ESV).
Those who are in the flesh cannot please God (Romans 8:8 ESV).
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:2 ESV).
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