There are so many things throughout my day that serve as a perfect opportunity to believe the Gospel, but that "little voice in my head" (aka. my flesh, the world or demons, etc) challenge that belief with fear, guilt and shame.
And I find that everyone...EVERYONE can relate...because we all have secrets that remain hidden because we fear what other people will think if they find out we have that struggle.
Here's an example. It wasn't too long ago when I was at the beach and had a crystal clear conviction from the Holy Spirit. "Son, walk the other way because I know it would not be good for you to keep walking there." Immediately the struggle came; namely, between walking straight or going another route. Then came the "rationale," "Just go straight. Your car is right there. It's more convenient." Needless to say, I went with my flesh and went straight I went.
Now, the sin that tangled me up for the next three days was not necessarily the act of looking at someone I should not have been looking at, but rather the FEAR that I lived in for three days. Fear to share with my brothers what I had chosen to do. SHAME of revealing my current struggle and wanting to wait for a "better time" to share. The GUILT that caused me to look down when my wife asked, "how are you?" The SIN that tangled me up with UNBELIEF that the gospel had set me free to be broken and in the midst of an ongoing struggle like everyone else.
The Gospel, mixed with FAITH sets us completely free from the bondage of shame and guilt. When we believe the Gospel, that good news of Jesus Christ, then we are completely set free to do whatever he has called us to do. In this case, it was to freely and openly expose my sin to my trusted brothers and sisters in Christ and most of all to my wife.
I struggled. I wrestled. I cried out to God, "Lord, I believe, but help my unbelief! Why am I wrestling with believing you have set me free!? Why do I feel guilt and shame for looking? Why can't I come to confess? Oh, Lord save me. Help my unbelief."
Then it happened, I picked up the phone, called one of the brothers. I received, grace, mercy and the sweet truth: "Hey Brother. Its okay. You just forgot who you are in Christ. Be free. Go ahead. The enemy has nothing on you. Call me later..."
That was it. I was encouraged and walked bravely into battle knowing HE has won the war. I shared with my wife, "Hey babe. I know why I've been angry lately...for the past three days. Well, I've been living in shame and guilt..." I unpacked the whole story and felt the graciousness and loving compassion of God the Father through my wife.
The Gospel is beautiful, isn't it...
Here's the full story found in Mark 9. May this story and the prayer of the father in verse 24 be etched into the forefront of your thinking for the rest of your life...
Jesus Heals a Boy with an Unclean Spirit
14 And when they came to the disciples, they saw a great crowd around them, and scribes arguing with them. 15 And immediately all the crowd, when they saw him, were greatly amazed and ran up to him and greeted him. 16 And he asked them, “What are you arguing about with them?” 17 And someone from the crowd answered him, “Teacher, I brought my son to you, for he has a spirit that makes him mute. 18 And whenever it seizes him, it throws him down, and he foams and grinds his teeth and becomes rigid. So I asked your disciples to cast it out, and they were not able.” 19 And he answered them, “O faithless generation, how long am I to be with you? How long am I to bear with you? Bring him to me.” 20 And they brought the boy to him. And when the spirit saw him, immediately it convulsed the boy, and he fell on the ground and rolled about, foaming at the mouth.21 And Jesus asked his father, “How long has this been happening to him?” And he said, “From childhood. 22 And it has often cast him into fire and into water, to destroy him. But if you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.” 23 And Jesus said to him, “‘If you can’! All things are possible for one who believes.” 24 Immediately the father of the child cried out[d] and said, “I believe; help my unbelief!” 25 And when Jesus saw that a crowd came running together, he rebuked the unclean spirit, saying to it, “You mute and deaf spirit, I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.” 26 And after crying out and convulsing him terribly, it came out, and the boy was like a corpse, so that most of them said, “He is dead.” 27 But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him up, and he arose. 28 And when he had entered the house, his disciples asked him privately, “Why could we not cast it out?” 29 And he said to them, “This kind cannot be driven out by anything but prayer.”[e]
No comments:
Post a Comment