The Idol of Approval Destroys Servanthood

Sometimes I go back (way back) and check my text messages...  Here's a good one that depicts the insidiousness of Idolatry; namely, the pursuit of approval.

Context: I helped a co-worker work through a seemingly bottomless pit of his marriage.  He had secrets that had been hidden for nearly a decade.  After he had been set free from the bondage of his fear of shame and guilt, he and his wife decided to renew their vows.  He called me one day and told me he wanted to renew his vows and he wanted me there.  I was ecstatic!  The night before the ceremony I sent him a text: (*names protected)...

Me: Bra, how long you been married? 3:20 AMFriend : 15 blessed years, my brother. 3:21 AMMe: sweet. i'm wrapping up the script. do you have VOWS. or do you want me to supply... 3:21 AMFriend : bro....everything is already taken care of....Pastor ___ is already taking care of the ceremony....we just wanted you and Janette to enjoy yourselves, as our friends. No stress. 3:28 AMMe: oops. I thought you asked me to do it for ya'll. i sent it to your email. 3:31 AMFriend : Bro....I am soooo sorry. I apologize for any miscommunication. WIFE and I seriously thought about you actually doing the ceremony, but we decided that we would like it better for you and Janette to enjoy it TOGETHER, holding hands in the audience, celebrating with us. 3:36 AMMe: no worries bro! Jn8:29 baby! thanks for thinking of us holding hands. 3:38 AMMe: just consider that script my love letter to both of you! 3:38 AMFriend : I love you too, my brother! 3:39 AMMe: chee hoo! see you tomorrow bright and early. 3:40 AM

What is hidden here is the fact that I sent the email after he had already told me I wasn’t conducting the ceremony!  I sent it in a hurtful state. C'mon RBAR!

And then the voice of God became so clear to me.  I could hear God saying, “Ryan.  I wanted to show you your motives for writing that script.  It wasn’t for me.  You wrote that script in order to be affirmed by your friends and validated by the guests.  Your pride is hindering your joy and praising of Pastor ___. Your pursuit of approval and power is robbing you of your joy.  Now go and sin no more.

From that moment on, I was set free from doing things for this couple with false motives.  Before anything, I could put my motives in check, ensure that my objective was to please the father, then execute whatever it was that I was doing.  It is so good to be free from needing to be affirmed.  It is so blessed to find my joy in the Lord and in Him alone.