I am a recovering “emotional insulationist.” This is not to be confused with emotional isolation, which is the distancing of oneself from others. As an insulationist, I would allow others “in” but not all the way. They got to know parts of me, but not all of me. I was insulating myself and essentially acting as my own Savior. I knew in my mind that God was my defense and my protection, but I bought the lie that I needed to protect myself by not being fully known in my struggles with lust, pride, and outbursts of anger just to name a few. And this mindset not only effected how I pastored, but it effected my marriage. I was not known by anybody in any context.
This all changed in 2012 when God brought a plumber into my life. He was able to point out the self-deception of emotional insulation and the evils of self-defending. On top of that God brought a stellar Navy Chaplain into my life named Paul. Paul sent a message out to several Chaplains in the region offering a 7-week CPE “crash course,” which implemented the group case study model of ministry. I was reluctant to join the group because CPE reminded me of hospital Chaplaincy and in my arrogance, I felt as if I was “too good for that.” I had been an “operational” guy who had deployed with Marine infantry, rode ships into 5th fleet in support of real world events, and served as special staff for a special operations unit.
Regardless of all the stigmas and stereotypes, I felt a conviction to join the course. It forever changed the way I approached ministry. The format was identical to the description in, “Shared Wisdom” by Jeffrey H. Mahan, Barbara B. Troxell and Carol J. Allen. They explained Case Study as a group sharing a written account of a significant incident with other ministry colleagues in a confidential setting for the purpose of theological reflection. “With the help of a designated facilitator, members of the group share their analysis and interpretation of the case and the case presenter’s actions.”1
The primary goal of the group is three-fold:2
1) To deepen the presenter’s self-understanding
2) to sharpen his or her clarity about the forces which she the situation of ministry
3) to increase the presenter’s effectiveness when he, or she, returns to the ministry site.
Having completed that one crash course using the case study model, I am an advocate for the Reflection/Case Study approach to sharing wisdom amongst ministry peers. But my change of perspective is not based on the pragmatism of group itself but the notion of honesty, transparency, and vulnerability. The introduction emphasized “a commitment to confidentiality” which is paramount in fostering honest feedback.
The question is, if I want to unleash my full potential as a minister of God’s good news in the role of a military chaplain, I must not have blind spots. And by definition, I cannot see any of my blind spots. Hence, I would be wise to seek out a peer group setting as prescribed by “Shared Wisdom.”
“Fresh understandings of ourselves and our ministries come when we find a different vantage point from which to look at our actions or a new context in which to think about our experience.”4.
Fellow ministers, go and do the same.
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1. Jeffrey H. Mahan, Barbara B. Troxell, and Carol J. Allen, Shared Wisdom: a Guide To Case Study Reflection in Ministry (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1993), 13.
2. Ibid.
3. Ibid., 17.
4. Ibid., 27.
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